Badass: someone who is unapologetically and authentically themselves. Someone who faces their fears (not just physical) and finds power in their vulnerability. That is a badass.
You might Google Michelle C Smith and find an accomplished Stunt Woman and Acrobat who’s worked on tv/movies such as Deadpool, Arrow, Smallville, etc. Her accomplishments speak for themselves, she’s a professional and her industry recognizes her for that.
However, Michelle’s story is so much more than just her accomplishments. It’s the story about her path to becoming a Professional Badass. A journey to “badassery" that began at a young age and leads down a path of losing an essential part of her integral being: her authenticity.
Her story begins with her batons...
At the age of 5, Michelle C Smith threw herself wholeheartedly into the sport of baton twirling. At 11, and for eight years thereafter, she competed at the World Championships and took home bronze, silver, and gold medals. It was clear, Michelle had what it took to beat the competition and she loved it. She was good at what she did, and her performance was her art.
Her batons were her world.
They always took full priority.
She placed her value and worth on the 32 inches of her apparatus.
With every toss, every twirl, she searched for acceptance and love.
From her peers. Her judges. Her family. Herself.
Her wins equaled her worthiness, her validity, her ability to be loved.
However, what was often overlooked in Michelle’s competitive career was a deep struggle with performance anxiety and mental health. It was a silent weight, heavy on her young shoulders and a puzzle Michelle desperately wanted to solve. Hoping that the next competition would be the one where she “figured it all out” and performed to her FULLEST potential.
Finally, at the age of 19 at the World Championship in Barcelona, at what should have been the last bravado of a successful career, distracted by the pressures she had placed on herself, Michelle’s love and value came crashing to the ground. She lost. Every smack of her batons on the floor signaled defeat. Bang. Devastation. Bang. Anger. Bang. Embarrassment.
What Michelle didn’t know then was that this would be the start of her radical awakening. A radical self-discovery that would be cultivated through heartache and pain but would intimately bring her back to her authentic self.
After vowing to put her batons down for good, she moved to Vancouver and started working for a professional circus company. She learned new skills, enjoyed playing and discovering different ways to move her body. But a small voice in her gut kept whispering: “Michelle, your batons. Remember your batons!”.
Pushing through the voice, she did what she does best: train and work. Avoid the pain. But for however long her resume grew, she never felt successful. Validation and acceptance eluded her and she always felt something was missing.
After no longer being able to ignore that gut feel